So being social isn’t really working out for me, I’m giving up for now. Kind of good on that front. It’s the end of the semester, got a few assignments left and I’m just about to disappear bruh. Honestly, after today y’all won’t see me until 2023. Just focusing on my own life, and staying out the way.

Life’s a little harder than I wish it was at the moment. My dad’s in the hospital and that’s the first time I seen that man in over a decade. I’ve been forced to deal with loneliness and shit, spent a month not speaking to my therapist because the site I used was shit and their support was responding at 1 week out at a time. So I’ve been forced to deal with all my emotions on my own really and it’s been eye opening. Then work has been stressful as I’ve been working almost 6-7 day weeks at a time most weeks since the summer. People don’t even know how hard I’ve been working. On top of me trying to finish my Associates degree.

Love was always a lot to ask for, so all I really wanted was rest and some consistency and I can’t even get that right now, so I’ve been spending all this time giving myself that and filling my time with things I should have been filling it with. And working more, a lot more. I’m slowly transitioning into someone that you will see occasionally because that’s how my relationships work and have always worked. I’ve just kind of accepted that. I no longer believe I don’t belong, but wasn’t never meant to stay around long. And I’m tired of overstaying my welcome.

Until things feel different, you’re really only going to see me when you see me.